Friday, September 23, 2011

Just keep on rolling

We're in a new hotel in a new town in a new state. Saw our favorite burn victim lurking around the other night and we decided it was time to move on. Hello again, Crispy. I don't know if you have a name or some sort of designation, and at this point, I frankly don't care.

A note about the previous post, the one from from whoever is using Marie's account. When I came rushing back home from college due to my mother's wreck and having to deal with all of that, I looked for our old photo albums. I turned the whole house upside down looking for them. They were't there. Three photo albums and approximately four hundred pictures, just missing. I thought my mom got rid of them due to certain events, but I guess I was wrong.I honestly don't want to have been wrong, because that just... Well, it adds another, different sort of creepy to the mix, doesn't it?

It's something that needs to be pursued, but right now, we're just focusing on getting by and dealing with the day to day insanities of this situation. Tall Dark and Creepy's been around as well, usually just watching. There one second and gone the next, like some sort of trick of the eye. Except you know by now that it isn't. You know by now that the things you see moving in the edges of your vision are at times real, and you know that they can see more of you than you can even see of yourself.

But you just keep going and keep resisting, because that's what counts some days. The ability to be stubborn and rebel against the roles you are set in. The ability to fight against the supposed fate somoeone has laid into your path. Maybe free will, as some claim, is an illusion, but you  cling to it with all of your might, and fight for it. You fight for the things that matter, the things that are worth something. If you're lucky, maybe you find those things that matter enough to fight for.

...Look at me, getting all psuedo-philosophical. Sweet baby Jesus on a pogo stick, I need to shut up before I dig myself a bigger hole to lie down in. Not like anyone gives a care about my ramblings.

Tia and Blake are keeping an even closer eye on me than usual after last night. I'm... I'm fine. For a given value of fine. I dreamed again last night, and woke up on a scream, drenched in sweat and my face covered in blood. Self-inflicted bleeding, at least. I clawed the facemask off in my sleep again and sliced open my cheek. It's not deep, just annoying...

I'm not sure why people read this, at the moment, but thanks for those who do care on one level or another. Really, it means more than you know. In fact, I barely know how to read. I don't even know what I'm typing right now. I'm just hitting random letters and punctuation and hoping it fools everyone fishcakes; saddlebag me dingo.

The jig, it is up.

Yeah. I've got to go. Feeling sick again, and I have some work to do and music to listen to.

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