Memories

Still having trouble keeping solid food down, on top of everything else.

Nobody's found the kids or searchers who went missing last month. Of course.

It's funny. I remember back when things were "normal", when dad hadn't disappeared off into the aether, and mom was still alive. We used to go camping all the time. I took comfort in those times, when I was spending time with my parents, dad taking me hunting. I thought we were happy. Heck, I even went to Girl Scout camp for seven years. All that sort of thing.

Looking back on that, I have to laugh a little. I'm not sure why I'm laughing other than the fact that the woods used to be a place I was never afraid of. I do remember the feeling of being watched, but that's it. That's not an uncommon thing in quiet areas, though.  maybe I'm weird, but that's something I've dealt with ever since I was a kid, that feeling of "Something's watching you from the dark". I never knew until recently how right I was.

My first nightmares were of the dark. I would be in some pitch black place, with near silence. It's funny that I remember it so clearly all these years since those specific dreams stopped. I would be in some sort of cavern, though the only way I could tell that was by touch and the sounds of water dripping. Things were moving around in the darkness around me, slight rustlings amplified by the weird acoustics. I would end up crawling along the floor in an attempt to get away or find my way out, but there was never any way to do so, the chill of the cavern seeping into my bones as I crawled farther and farther into the depths. In some of the nightmares, there was this horrible screeching sound, but I always woke up before anything else happened.

Not like anyone gives a rip about these little stories. This, the undertoad, it's all just stupid history compared to right now.




Later: Sorry, I had to leave this window up for a bit due to the fact that someone threw something through one of the front windows of the house. I'll have to fine some way to seal that or get that repaired... Lovely... And of course, the piece of cinder block has a few symbols painted on it...And what looks and smells like blood. Getting that thing out of the house as soon as I can. I saw blood in the grass out there, but I'm not going to go check on it right now. Looks like it's just blood, nothing with it. Ugh. I've got the shakes somethign fierce right nnow.  Patch is frreaking out, and Marie is having her own tizz. I need to puke or cry, or something.