Saturday, April 7, 2012

We Soldier On... Or Something

Maybe I was trying to be nice about your attitude and demeanor, Kailin.

They took Tia away yesterday. The doctors wouldn't tell us what exactly was wrong, but well... You saw what Kailin overheard. I was almost tempted to poke zer to nick Tia's chart. If nothing else, due to my job, I'm good at deciphering nurse's notes and stuff from doctors.

We couldn't chance getting kicked out, though. Of course. So we just sat yesterday, and talked some. Kailin's definiely interesting to talk to sometimes. But then again, I commend anyone that can keep up with my nervous rambling.

Essentially, due to the circumstances, they probably had to either induce labor or abort... It wouldn't even be counted as a miscarriage at this point. It'd just be count as a lost pregnancy. I just... This is wrong.

I hate being unable to do anything. They brought back Tia last night... She's so pale, and she hasn't woken up yet. She seems more stable, though. Less shuddery and at least there's a few positive things there... She's just... asleep now. I talked one of the nurses into letting us stay in Tia's room again with her. If nothing else, it would be good to have someone in here in case she wakes up. 

I feel sure she's going to be disoriented when she wakes. Because she's going to wake up.

...One of the nurses just said the doctor wants to speak with me when he comes in today. I'm not sure if this is a good or bad thing. This is going to be hell on our funds, but at least we have stuff saved up still.  It's worth it, anyway. I just wish... I wish things weren't this way. But then, don't we all?

I've seen a few things around here that have put me on edge, but for now, my focus is Tia and Kailin and maintaining things as best I can.  Everything seems to be trying to crumble, though. As always. And I've been making myself sick again. We'll manage, though. I don't know what else to say other than that right now.


  1. I'm so sorry, hon.

    Is that...?

    1. Thanks, Elaine... Just need to voice some things, I guess.


  2. Replies
    1. Presumably a crane or something else based along those lines.

  3. Are they taking the choice away from her, or is she simply not conscious to MAKE the decision?

    1. She wasn't conscious. She's still not. I can't say anything either way, and her family is multiple states away.

      It feels... wrong. I mean... They were saying that it was a case of her or the baby, from what Kailin was saying. And with the baby such a short way along, there was apparently no possibility of saving both.

      She was having what appeared to be some kind of seizures, as Kailin said, there was blood of a rather unnatural tint, and she hasn't been awake or coherent since the second.

      There's something wrong here. On more than one level.

  4. Is that,... a diagonal forest with things drawn across it?