If you're going through hell, just keep moving

 We've got a kid sleeping in out hotel bathtub. Well, not a kid, a teenager. Okay, let me backtrack a little bit.

We ended up heading southeast a bit, I think? Okay, I'm honestly so bad with directions. But that's beside the point. We were out shopping today, getting some groceries, essentials, mostly. Eating fast food can only go so far, especially with my making myself sick with stress half the time and Tia well, needing actual food. So we got food.

All nice and you know, not that strange. We were actually having a bit of fun, chatting, all that nice stuff. Things have been... nice between Tia and I recently. Yeah, nice. Hee. Umn, no creepy notes have been showing up, no anything. I've been reading through Marie's notes again, but that's stuff for another time. Anyway.

We were driving back to the hotel, and suddenly about halfway there, there's this... grayness. I mean, I feel sure the colors weren't actually bleeding away and fleeing from that... wrongness. From what I can tell, Tia didn't really see it that way. It's weird, how these things happen, it's like this warping of the fabric of things, the fleeing of normalcy. But yeah, that's when we heard it.

We followed the sounds, and there's this kid, curled up, praying, looking like shit at the end of the street. Things are eerily quiet other than that, empty. Hate it when things get like that. It's just wrong. Well, a lot of this is wrong, but back on the subject. Zie's just a-praying. And there He is, standing over the kid, all this rippling around Him, looking like a squid orgy, the sound of...tearing, and then gone. Like He was never there, the colors are back, the sounds after a few minutes. Well, other than the fact that we now have a really screwed-over teen on our hands.

We snagged zer and bolted for the car after checking for broken bones. It hurt thoguh, I could tell that much, considering the outright scream when we first touched zer. Surprisingly, there were none, just these... burns on the chest and back, fairly extensive. They're all black and gross, but I'm tending to them as best I can now that we're back at the hotel. I wanted to go to the hospital, but zie was vociferous about negating that idea. Zie calmed down quick enough, but there's this tenseness there, which is understandable, really. Two strange chicks pop out of nowhere. Got the kid to give me a name, at least. Kailin. That and the fact that I was apparently to use gender-neutral terms once zie noticed I was writing a bit.

Skinny, skinny kid, about fifteen or sixteen, if I had to guess, long black hair, darkish skin, big brown eyes. Obviously been on a good few miles of hard road. We got Kailin cleaned up and I've been tending to zer a bit. Talking a little, abut me and Tia... Talking to Tia.

She was slightly reluctant at first to pull Kailin into our little fold despite being concerned, but I'm not going to abandon zer, not like this, not in this state. So... She's trusting my judgement on this, though she says it's sort of probationary (I'm paraphrasing, but she cussed and I'm not in the mood to do that.)

We decided since it's a one-bed hotel room, once the tub was scrubbed out, that would most likely be better than the floor. I dragged my pillows out of the truck and into the room, and called for some extra blankets, and we padded the tub up into a pallet. So there we are at the moment. It's time to do what I can, at least.

Well, Now I'm Pissed

I just missed my...


Fuckshit. This fucking sucks. Give it a week. Calm the fuck down.


I'm fine.

Off. Everything's Off.

I'm not feeling right. Still. I pushed the girls to start moving anyway. I'm going to survive. Whatever. My head aches all the time but we've been stationary way too long and maybe the place is contributing to the way everything's grating on my nerves lately. I'm antsy. I know it. It's off. I'm trying not to be.


Every little thing though. Just rubs me the wrong way. I'm going to pull myself together.


If it can be described in medical terms, it's like I've developed acute paranoia in the past week and a half and I'm trying to keep it where I was before. But you know, this recent development keeps me from keeping my calm.


And, you know, seeing things doesn't exactly help. I don't think I need to clarify on the sort of things, do I?


Apparently I'm paranoid schizophrenic now. Delusional, hallucinating, paranoid, argumentative, angry, inappropriate emotional responses. Is this the part where I just go 'eh, it happens'?


No, no this is the part where I pull myself back together. Or try to.


Guess we'll see.

Time to Vomit?

There isn't any.


Sweet mother of Jesus fucking Christ, what the hell just fell on my doorstep? What the hell just developed in this crazy life I share? What the fuck did we just invite into our small, travelling troupe? What. The. Fuck?


Maybe I should step back and tell a story here. If I could tell a complete story, I would. But I can't right now. I don't have all the motherfucking details. Here: I'll paint my half of the picture for you.


Lis has been insisting that Blake and I have some "us" time. We've all been in the same room for the past however long now and she's been feeling like she's imposing (she's not, but it's how she feels) so she insists she goes out alone and she insists that she'll be okay. It's only after she's completely convinced me she'll be okay that we let her go out and do her own thing. That was about 5 hours ago. She left, and on her end of the picture, I imagine she went to a quaint little cafe or quiet little bookstore or peaceful little deli. That's to her taste. I don't actually know because she's practically cata-fucking-tonic. But she'd enjoy that sort of thing, so that's what I imagine her intent was tonight.


On our end of the picture, we have a nice little romantic in the hotel picnic with candlelight and wine and cheap sushi we bought from the grocery, and we're happy for the moment if only because we're blissfully unaware. So things are turning into a nice night between Blake and I, and because we were assured that Lissie would be okay, we let go of the thoughts that might hold us back.


And let me be honest. We weren't holding back. It's been a long time. I'm sure you get the idea and I'm sure I don't need to go into detail. So here we are in the hotel room, highly distracted, when there's a loud THUMP at the door, and I can't be too sure it's our door, but it's a really loud thump. I'm not going to take any chances.


So I find the nearest shirt available, throw it on and open the door to find a slumped Lis falling against my bare legs. And she's bloody. She's bloody and I can barely hear her rasp an "I'm sorry," - that's so Lis - apologizing when she's bleeding out on the floor. Well, there goes us time. I'm not even thinking about it when I'm dragging Lis into the bathroom and fetching the first aid/sewing kit. Nope. I see a nice gash there on her rib cage, right side, nice and deep. It's not bleeding too bad at this point, but my guess is because she doesn't have much blood left in her.


Clean cloth for the wound? Check. Have Blake run for ice for numbing? Check (even if she's not responding to much anyway). Foreign materials removed from the wound? My least favorite part, and check. Sanitized needles? Check. Thread? Check. 14 stitches later the wound looks pretty clean. Daddy taught me well. With Blake's help we manage to get her into her bed and between the two of us we get some fluid in her. It's easier said then done. And now we can only hope she wakes up.


A note for when Lis wakes up, because she's going to wake up: make sure the girl eats more (and keeps more down). She's even skinnier shirtless than I thought she'd be. It's worrisome.


On another note, it seems that Crispy will no longer be an issue, view Case 1C. Apparently we're not a threat. That's a good sign. For now, I'll take it. I figured Crispy was the culprit, but I wasn't exactly thinking about it when I was stitching Lis up. I don't like this road we're on. Not one bloody bit.

Chapstick, Chapped Lips, and Things Like Chemistry

Things to not say while Running.
"What could go wrong?" Everything can go wrong.
"Things are looking good." Without appending "for the moment".
"Lookit what I can do!" Self-explanatory.
"Gun it."
"Let's go walk in the moonlight. It'll be romantic."

We went for a grocery run today, and of course, it went right sideways. Tia and I got jumped in the parking lot by some jerks in hoodies.  Elaine, August, Spencer, there may be a delay on those scarves. I may have left my crochet hook sticking out of someone's face.

I'm a bit concussed and scraped up, among other things, but nothing that's not livable.  Tia dealt with things rather a bit better, and Blake may have hit one of them with the Explorer when he came to pick us up from where he'd been parked. Oopsie.  I'm not sure how things are going at the moment, but I've cleaned and dealt with any other injuries. Talked them out of taking me to the ER unless I start acting really off. If one of the others wants to be more talkative about what happened, they can. Worst part... My eggs got smashed, so I can't fix what I wanted. We're driving again anyway. Heh.

It's funny, in a sad way...  I'm seeing so much more than I ever have, and so much more clearly. I've been a lucky, lucky girl, no matter what incidents have befallen me, they're not worth anyone's worry or stress. I just wish... I wish I could do more.

There are locks on the doors
 And chains stretched across all the entries to the inside
 There's a gate and a fence
 And bars to protect from only God knows what lurks outside

Going to go find her, soon as they stop wtching me. They probly think this was me. Stupid pain meds aking me really out of it, though. Ti left my lptop, though. An I'm awake, so that's smthing.

I don't remember anything but screaming.

She thinks she's protecting me, you know.
 Me and Tia and her therapist and everyone.
Protecting us by hiding how this is really effecting her in her jumbly ciphers and her trying to keep Tia away.
 She's crying again in the other room, though.
She's trying to protect us, but right now, she can't even handle herself.
Not with putting so much responsibility that nobody is aiming at her on herself.
She thinks I don't hear when she cries and is freaked out by what's going on.
I do...
And I understand, kind of.
He's coming, anyway.
He's outside again right now.
Not doing anything...
Just watching.
And waiting.
From what I remember, He...
It.
The Amazing Mr. Tentacle.
Whatever, is good at waiting. 
I think that it's almost worse than if he was doing something.
I'm scared.
Terrfied.
I hate to admit it, since I'm supposed to be all teenagery and bravado-filled, but I remember how Jared was before he disappeared.
They never found the body.
We're not going to be able to pull this off, and Lis is too much of a loon to reach out to any of the others who could help.
She's almost as scared of those being pursued as she is of those pursuing.
I'm holding her here.
Holding her back from running.
I'm already sick.
I was born sick.
I almost wish she would just leave me, but I know she's not going to.
I'm scared of what will happen if she does.
-Marie

P.S. Sorry I posted on you blog, Lis, but you left it up.
And I didn't even curse any.
Remind me to get more insulin from the parentals soon.
I know you're not going to be mad at me for posting this.
You're going to be disappointed, which is much worse.
Tonight is a night where things are happening, though.
Bad things.
Just like every other night, right?