Monday, February 13, 2012

Yeah, anyway

Dreamer, hm? Dreamer, Heroine, Bloodstained Handmaiden, Lis. I'm just Lis. I'm nobody important, except to a few people. It doesn't help that one of those idiotic nicknames came from our ever-so-dear-Shepherd and one from Marie. I'm nobody. I am beneath notice. I am insignificant. I keep saying it, but people try to deny it and see something else.

Kailin calls me an optimist, and maybe, in comparison to zer, I  am. But then, a lot of people are, in comparison to Kailin. The kid's been through a lot. That's not my story to tell, though.

Dreams, right... Yeah, I dream a lot. People, places, things unfamiliar, and things better left unseen. I paint. People, places and things better left unseen. I dispose of many of the paintings. Most of them are of no worth anyway, and aren't exactly for mass consumption. I just sometimes have to get things out of my head and onto paper, you know? Some people do that with writing. I guess I do it with paintings? Well, paintings and my random rambles. But then, nobody really cares about an artist until they're dead or insane, anyway.

Most of it's stuff that doesn't make any sense. It's funny. It's like I dream in abstracts sometimes. Life is mutable. Every choice, every moment changes something. It's pointless to ever think you can know every angle, even when you feel like you do. There are shadows from every side, anyway. People focus so much on the evil that they know, but mabe there's more there.

And now I sound as silly and ominous as Kailin. Heh... Anyway, I'm likely to keep having weird dreams. I've had them for years, before any of this happened. They've just gotten more prominent and bothersome recently. By the way, I'm getting a new tattoo, I think. If I'm going to look odd, might as well really go for it. And I may not post another painting on my next post... I don't know, it all depends on what falls out of my head between now and the next time I decide to write.

7 comments:

  1. Well I like the painting and you are on the list of people who are important to me.

    So what kind of tattoo are you getting?

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    1. Well, thanks. I don't know, this isn't even my silly self-esteem stuff. It's just somethign that seems to be.

      I'm thinking about either a hummingbird or a bluebird. There's a lot of symbolism in both that would fit rather well with a few things, but I'm also looking at a few other ideas.

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  2. Oh I could never get a tattoo, Too scared to. Hummingbird and bluebird sound nice though.

    I've been speaking to someone else who gets their thoughts out better through artistic work too. If it helps, I'd say keep doing it.

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    1. I already got one, a few years back, when I was in college. It's nothing really ornate, just a sort of "bracelet" tattoo of some words I like to keep in mind.

      It's an outlet, and sometimes I just really need one. Too many things going on inside my head and all that silliness.

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  3. I was going cryptic and insightful thanks. Not silly and ominous. XP

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    1. I'm the one who sounds silly, hon. You can sound however you want.

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    2. Awwwe, mum you're so awesome. Thanks. <3

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